#29: SLEEP!

I've always had a hard time getting myself to bed at night, and the mornings are even worse. I'm lethargic and half asleep while getting ready and have to fight myself to not lay back down in the bed. 

Starting tonight, it changes. I'm not staying up super late to write posts anymore, they'll be done at a reasonable hour. Packing my lunch won't wait until 10:30. I'm giving myself a bedtime, and I'm getting the rest I need for my body to recuperate from the day. Hopefully getting myself in a nighttime routine will help with a morning routine, too. 

Goodnight, and wish me luck! Oh, and if you're reading this, you should probably hit the hay too :) 

#14: What a nightmare

Zombies have permeated every corner of recent pop culture. I am no stranger to the undead. I watch The Walking Dead, love the movie Zombieland, I've run in a zombie 5k, gone to a zombie prom...

...dressed as a zombie, of course...

...I even made myself into one of those scary Walking Dead zombies with the Dead Yourself app. 

While I have immersed myself in zombie culture, it has come back to bite me in the ass. Last night I had a terrifying dream where I was trapped in a house with talking zombies (and not nice ones like on Warm Bodies) and I couldn't kill them. I tried and tried but couldn't get the upper hand. I barricaded myself in a back room and had no hope for escape. 

Lately I've been having a lot more scary dreams, mostly in the mornings when I wake up at 4 or 5 a.m. and fall back asleep. I'm glad I'm not having those sleep paralysis dreams anymore because that would be way too much to handle. These dreams have been giving me a really hard time to get rest at night though, when I'm tossing and turning and trying to avoid being eaten.  

I don't know why it's happening all of a sudden, because I haven't watched anything particularly scary lately. The Walking Dead doesn't scare me (at least I didn't think so) because most of the people they meet are more horrible than the zombies. Other than the more tame zombie stuff, I'm terrified of all other scary movies and stay far far away. I haven't even played Left 4 Dead in like a year. If I had nightmares after playing that, it would make sense. 

Dream-me is going to have to go into some serious survivalist training or something,  and maybe make friends with Daryl and Michonne, because they can take care of business, and I have just got to get some sleep. 

We all have our demons

Mine just happen to be sleep related.

Okay, so I don't have an actual demon. At least I hope not...

The Nightmare by Henry Fuseli (stolen from Wikipedia)

It's sleep paralysis. It happens when your body is in REM sleep and paralyzed, but you are awake and aware. You can open your eyes, and sometimes have hallucinations. It really does feel like the picture above, you feel like someone is sitting on your chest and holding you down. It is really common, and most people have it happen at some point in their life. Unfortunately it seems to be a recurring thing for me. 

The first time it happened, I was alone in my apartment and napping on the couch. I heard someone whisper in my ear. I opened my eyes and no one was there. I tried to say "hello?" but I couldn't open my mouth or make a sound. I tried to get up and couldn't move. I knew for sure that my apartment was haunted. I decided that they were too new to have someone die/be murdered there, so they must have been built on an Indian burial ground. After it happened again, I just had to Google it. I found out that I wasn't feeling the wrath of some dead Indian chief, but a lot of other people come to the same conclusion. Here are some of my favorite folk lore explanations (also stolen from Wikipedia): 

*Various parts of North America--an "Old Hag" leaves her physical body at night and sits on your chest. You can summon her as a curse on others by reciting the Lord's Prayer backwards. 

*Fiji--it is called "kana tevoro" which is being 'eaten' or possessed by a demon. Often this is thought to be a dead relative on unfinished business, and your other relatives try to talk to it. 

*Nepal--caused by a 'Khyaak,' which is a ghost that lives under your staircase.

*Malta--an attack by "Haddiela," similar to a poltergeist. To prevent attacks, you must sleep with a piece of silverware or knife under your pillow. 

The most scary occurrence was when I had a dream about some creeper chasing me, then I woke up to find him hovering over my bed. Shane was in bed asleep next to me, but I couldn't call for help, couldn't fight off my attacker. I just knew I was about to be chopped into little bits. Obviously, it was just a hallucination, or I wouldn't be typing this right now. 

Now when it happens, I am a little more aware of what is going on, but it still freaks me out. And how could you not be? There are a few possible causes

*Sleeping on your back--can't control that one. I toss and turn like crazy. 

*Increased stress--considering I am at the least stressful point thus far in my life...maybe a lack of stress?

*Lack of sleep or irregular sleep patterns--I am getting the most sleep ever, and actually sort of have a bedtime now. 

*Sudden environmental/lifestyle changes--Check, and check

Let's hope that I might actually get settled in here and quit having these freaky instances. If not, Shane might get frustrated when he finds all the spoons missing out of the silverware drawer and hidden under my pillow...